Happy Mother's Day My Ass!!

Don't get it twisted. I have the GREATEST mom in the world. And I mean that.

If there was a contest in which mothers across the globe competed in things like Nurturing, Culinary Skills, Child Reering, Guidance and Mentoring, Talent, Beauty, and Satisfying Her Husband...



(Look at her beauty, her wonderful husband, and those kitchen skills!! Not to mention her talent!!)

*in my taunting school yard voice*

My Mom Is Better Than Your Mom!!

*gives you the finger and walks away*

However, there isn't a contest of such so consider yourself lucky cause my mom's would've won that joint for the past 31 years...Hands Down!!
Instead of having a great competition that would encourage the Strength, Resiliency, and Foresight amongst moms in America, we have this asinine, meaningless, Hallmark-invented holiday known as Mother's Day. This is the day where everyone with a mom (or motherly figure) is suppose to acknowledge the great "mothers" in their life. Dead-beat moms, Irresponsible Baby Mamas, and Young ass Baby Mamas' Mamas (also known as 40-year-old 'GRAND mamas') partake in this glorious day and bask in the glow of receiving cards, flowers, gifts, praise, and everything under the sun on this fiscal holiday. They kick back on this day, get taken out to dinner, and are told by everyone (including strangers) "Happy Mother's Day!"

Let's be real...

Half of these chicks aren't even REAL mothers. Yes, they bore a child, or two, or three, or four, or ELEVEN, but if they're all by different fathers, are you REALLY a good mother??

There was a story recently here in Atlanta in which a mother went to school with her daughter and whooped the teacher's ass over a grade dispute in front of the rest of the class. What kind of example is that?? Or what about this seven-year-old who stole his grandma's car and took it on a joy ride? Where was mom??

You got mothers out there who don't even know who the father of their child really is. They just played "Eenie-Meeney-Miney-Pick-A-Nigga" and pinned the fatherhood on whatever dummy who believed he was the "only one" or the one they feel is most fit to be a dad. Does that broad deserves a "Mother's Day"??

We live in a day and age where celebrity mothers pimp out their kids to the magazine who pays the most for exclusive baby pictures of their newborns, career-absorbed mothers are too busy with their work load to even learn who their child's friends and their parents are, and some mothers are just cranking out kids to remain on government assistance. And Hallmark tells me these bytches deserve a fuggin' greeting card??

Shiiiiiddddd...Happy Mother's Day My Ass!!

Now, if you're like me (and you very well may be with the exception that your mom ain't as good as mine), you don't need a day set aside to appreciate all the wonders that your mother has provided you. If you're like me, it may be a Tuesday or a Saturday when you think of that special interaction, conversation, or moment between you and your mom that puts that warm feeling in your heart - not just a Sunday in May. If you're like me, all the flowers, cards, trinkets, jewlery, gifts, spa treatments, clothing, shoes, dinners, WHATEVER could not place a value on the Love, Life, and Lessons you receive from your mother.

Thanks Hallmark for creating Mother's Day and all the other senseless holidays you've created for economical gains at the expense of simple-minded individuals who can't seem to express their genuine feelings without breaking bread at the local mall or restaurant. But I'll pass. Give that purposeless balloon, card, and plant to one of the dead-beat moms out there.

Mine deserves more than that.

Everyday is Mother's Day Mom,
Love Ya!!

Special shout out to all the single and married mothers who have stepped up to the plate and handled their responsibility accordingly in what is arguably the hardest job of them all.